fatherslove | (no subject)

"Five minutes, then?" His thumb passed absently over his wrist. His memories of needles weren't especially good ones. But they also weren't entirely bad. EVE, and power flooding into his veins.

"Or longer?"

"How about five minutes for the first time and see where we can go from there?" she asked with a smile, taking lines out of the PASIV, one for each of them. Hooking herself up was no problem, but she paused before she did anything for Delta, holding the line and looking up at him.

"This is okay?" she asked, wanting to be sure.

He hesitated a second more - but not because he was afraid. He wasn't sure what he was feeling. And whatever it was, it wasn't going to get in the way; he took the line from her and nodded, slipping it under the skin of his wrist.

"It's okay."

"Okay," she said, then leaned forward to kiss him again, her hand on his face. Still sitting close to him, she dropped her hand to his knee. "Now tell me where you want to go." There were a few places she'd tried her best to remember, recreating all the details she could, but she wanted him to be able to pick.

"I... don't know," he murmured against her mouth. For an instant, just sitting like this with her felt like enough. He didn't even feel the needle in his wrist anymore. Then he remembered what she had said on the beach.

"Romania. Show me one of the forests."

"Romania it is," she said, then leaned forward to press the plunger on the PASIV before she leaned back against the couch again. She could see it already, one place she'd gone in particular, the forest lush and green, an old castle rising out of the trees and before she had a chance to look over at Delta again, she was asleep.

When she opened her eyes, she was at the base of the castle, the stone wall towering over her, throwing her into its shadow. It looked exactly like she remembered it.

For a moment he had no idea where he was.

He was looking out over a forest, he could tell that much immediately, but it seemed thicker and felt older than anything in Arcadia, or anything in the countryside around Darrow. There was a shadow at the corner of his vision and he turned, and now he knew he wasn't anywhere he had been before, staring up at the wall that dwarfed him.

That dwarfed them. He wasn't alone.

When he looked at Lily, he started to remember. It bled back in slowly, gradually. It wasn't real. But it felt real.

"This is..." he started to say, and then fell silent again, slowly turning in place and trying to see everything at once.

"I know," she said, turning to look at the forest that spread around them. She'd been here before, really here and she'd been into a dream with Neil, but even so, this was incredible. Eames had said something once about creating from memories, that it wasn't always safe to do so, but it was one time and she wasn't going to do anything complex with it. She was secure in her ability to know what was real and what wasn't for now.

Turning back to Delta, she held her hand out toward him. She wanted to go further into the trees, then come back for the castle.

Slowly, still moving as if stunned, he took her hand. It was good that she was there to lead him, he decided. He wouldn't have the first idea where to go anyway.

"I didn't think it would all be so big."

Linking her fingers with his, she led Delta further into the trees, into the dark, quiet green, a canopy of leaves stretching overhead. "It's old," she said, even though she knew it wasn't really. It was all in her head, something she'd made, but she'd felt it was old at the time and so she'd created it that way.

There was a path, a hiking trail, and she walked along slowly until she could hear the sound of running water, then she broke off from the path and walked straight through the trees.

He followed her, his hand in hers, and he couldn't help thinking of fairy tales, of journeys through enchanted woods and castles on hills - all the things the Little Sisters had chattered happily about on the shoulders of their Daddies.

But this was so real. Even though he knew it was anything but. It didn't matter. It felt real enough to cut.

After a few moments, they emerged from the trees again, at the edge of the water. It wasn't quite big enough to be called a river, but it was wider than a stream and the sun shot through the leaves of the trees above them. It was exactly as she remembered it and she smiled, turning toward him.

"I think this is Biertan," she said. "We came here on a day off, driven most of the way and then walked the rest of the way in. I spent most of the day here."

"I can see why you would want to stay." By the water's edge he released her hand, dropped into a crouch and dipped his fingers into the sun-dappled water. It was cold, surprisingly so, and sent a pleasant little shiver up his arm.

"Biertan," he echoed softly, feeling the shape of the word. A new word, for a new place.

She remembered that day, how the other dancers had wanted her to come into the castle with them and she'd gone eventually, but not before spending most of her time alone by the water. She spent so much time being social that people tended to be surprised when she wanted to be alone, but it happened every now and then.

"The others went into the castle to explore," she said. "It was so quiet." Like it was now. She was sure there would be people inside the castle, but out here they were alone.

It was quiet, quiet in a way that even the countryside near the city never really was. No sounds of people, no rumbling of cars. Just birds and the breeze in the treetops, and the murmur of the water.

"I also didn't think it would be so real." He looked up at her again, smiling. "Thank you for showing this to me."

"You're welcome," she said, smiling back at him. Even though she'd gone in with Neil before, even though Eames had explained it to her, it was different now. Recreating from a memory felt different and she was glad she'd been able to do it and glad she could share it with Delta.

"Do you want to see the castle?" she asked, moving closer to him so she could sit on a stone near the water. "Or stay here?"

"I don't know." He tipped his head back, closed his eyes, felt the sun on his face and the breeze through the forest. He couldn't imagine moving. But he also couldn't imagine staying in one place.

"I think... we could walk back to the castle." He reached for her hand again. "But we don't have to hurry."

They had the hour and all the time after that, if they chose, so Lily nodded, smiling as she took Delta's hand. If they went in again, they'd have to start thinking about totems and other precautions, but it could wait. For now, she just wanted to enjoy this.

Getting to her feet again, she ducked under a tree, then said, "There are bears in these woods. And deer and moose." But she knew the bear population was supposed to be quite large.

He looked over at her and then out at the trees again, remembering what she had said about there being no danger but wondering anyway. Did he have to be on his guard? "Is that something we have to worry about?"

"No," Lily said, because she hadn't seen any bears during her time there and she wasn't remembering this place with them. But since they were alone, she thought it would likely be safe for her to change something and so she paused, concentrating, then smiled as a deer emerged from the trees across the small river. "I promise not to imagine any bears."

He froze, watching the deer move. He had seen them before, of course; the countryside around the city was full of them. But this was somehow wilder, almost magical, and he squeezed Lily's hand, unconsciously pulling her a little closer.

"Did you do that?"

She nodded, smiling as she pressed closer against Delta, one hand creeping up to rest against his side. Across from them, the deer lifted her head, frozen in the sunlight, and although Lily had made her, she was sure she couldn't possibly begin to control her. For a moment, it seemed like the deer might run, but then she relaxed again and lowered her head to continue her grazing.

"I probably shouldn't do it very often, but I couldn't resist," she said.

"That's the kind of thing that... gets attention?" He kept himself still, watching it graze, the sun dappling its warm brown back. There was something about it that almost looked more real than he was used to, like a velvety texture to its coat that he could almost touch from where he was. The way the best dreams were so deeply felt, so elusive.

The bread we eat in dreams, he thought. Not his own thought. He'd read it somewhere but couldn't recall it now.

Lily nodded, still watching the deer as it moved through the tall grass, then wandered away through the trees. "Yeah, if I do it too much, it's like your mind rebels," she said, then smiled. "I'm not too worried about it out here, it seems like your subconscious is all back at the castle."

They would probably be tourists, guides, locals. All mixed together, all suspicious of her.

"Too bad." He shot her a smile. "I'd like to see what else you can do."

He turned toward her, moving a little closer, reaching up to cup her face with his hand. "Maybe we should stay out here a little longer, then," he murmured, and leaned in to kiss her.

It was pure impulse, just because it felt like the right thing to do at that moment. And it was also very much like the kisses before. But there was an edge to it now, something pushing up inside him. So it was also... different.